What I Learned the First Year

An end of a year is rapidly approaching.  O is going to be one on Friday.  In this house we celebrate birthdays.  We celebrate birthday weeks and if you are lucky enough to have your birthday fall on a weekend you by default, get two birthday weeks. It's the law. O is lucky enough to have his very first birthday fall on a Friday, two weeks baby!  Unfortunately the birthday week started off with a minor rash that was preceded by a fever.  Our rambunctious little dude has not been himself since Friday.  He's totally lethargic wanting to do nothing but sit on my lap and snuggle (not the worse thing in the world) but it does make preparing for a birthday party a bit difficult. He's been sleeping like a champ (also not the worse thing in the world) but I do have to say I miss my little guy.  I miss cleaning up the tupperware cupboard 12 times a day, I miss him dancing to his Halloween Frankenstein toy that sings "Monster Mash" (see video below) and I miss him eating me out of house and home. Hopefully by Saturday he'll be his old self because he has a birthday cake to destroy!!

Of course with the birthday approaching I'm feeling a bit nostalgic.  One of my besties just had her beautiful baby boy on April 10th and seeing pictures of him makes me miss those days of napping on the couch with Oliver on my chest and watching hours of television while I nursed. Times have changed around here and that's okay.  Each stage is so wonderful, new and exciting.  Every few months I find myself saying, "this is my favorite, I love this stage". Here are some of the things I've learned during this whirlwind of a year.


1.) I don't regret rocking him to sleep
          There are so many schools of thought on how to get your baby to sleep.  Do co-sleep, don't co-   sleep. Cry it out, don't cry it out.  Create a routine, don't rock them too long.  To all of those first time mommas out there and to the me of a year ago I say "do what works for you!!!!" We have had our ups and downs in the sleeping department so I am in no way saying that I know what is right or wrong but I do know that I do not regret one second I spent rocking Oliver at night to go to sleep.  We eventually did have to practice a bit of the cry it out when sleeping got really bad.  We would get him on a good routine and then life would happen.  Family would visit, we'd be traveling, ear infections and teething would cause routines to go down the drain.  Eventually you climb back out of the valley of the baby waking every 3 hours wanting to be held.  One day Oliver just started going to sleep on his own.  I would lay him down after a few lullabies, he would still be awake but sleepy and I'd tell him sleep tight baby boy and he would miraculously go to sleep.  Cue the Rocky theme and me pumping my fists in the air.  I'm sure there are more valleys that we will have to endure but right now we're riding this sleeping wave and loving it.


2.) I can run on less sleep than I ever thought possible
          Back in my hay day I could sleep like a champ.  I've been known to have a bit of narcolepsy when it comes to things such as riding in a car, watching a movie after 7:15 pm, and if I've just had a good meal, well, forget about it.  In the weeks before I had Oliver everyone kept saying "sleep while you can" and "you'll be so tired in few weeks take advantage of your sleep now".  The fact was, I couldn't sleep then either.  Between laying awake nights thinking about things that still needed to be done and tossing and turning because laying on one side too long would cause such a violent cramp in my hips there wasn't much sleep happening regardless. Then after Oliver came I kept waiting for this wave of extreme fatigue to set in.  To be honest the wave of adrenaline far outweighed the fatigue.  A year later I'm still sometimes riding that adrenaline, oh sure there are days when I'm so tired I could puke but for some reason it's so much easier to power through now.  We've settled into a routine that requires me to wake up at 4:30 every morning, pre-baby this would be BRUTAL, but I've gotten used to it.  When he doesn't wake up at 4:30 I find myself at about 4:27 wide awake, staring at the ceiling waiting for his little cry to signal me to come.


3.) Stop reading things on the internet
          We live in a very self-diagnosing time in society.  With sites like Web MD all of us sometimes have too much information at our fingertips. I very much appreciate the ability to Google, what does a poison ivy rash look like but you have to know when to shut it off.  From the moment I found out I was pregnant every little twinge, every little malady became a cause for concern.  Now with a baby roaming around the house and into every little thing and mixing snotty noses and sticky hands at the park there usually isn't a month that goes by that some sort of sickness doesn't creep into this house.  I have learned though that if you let yourself get caught up in the world wide web of pictures of rashes and descriptions of symptoms a simple cold can go from an ear infection, to influenza, to full blown pneumonia without even consulting a doctor.  12 months later I still consult the internet from time to time to check symptoms but I know that I can't let myself get caught up in it or I will scare the crap out of myself.  Luckily we have a great pediatricians office that has a great nurse line and we have urgent care 365 days a year.


4.) Sometimes babies just cry
          When I was about 6 months pregnant and still working at the bank a new mom came in to do some business.  Her baby couldn't have been more than a week old and she had her all bundled up in her carrier and sitting on the ground while she was filling out her paperwork.  About a minute into the transaction the baby started crying such an awful gut wrenching newborn cry.  The kind of cry that makes you want to slam on your brakes in the car, pull to the side of the road and comfort the crap out of this kid.  But the mom just kept filling out paperwork, occasionally trying to soothe the baby with a shush but still continuing to do her thing.  The baby kept crying, the mom kept her cool and I became borderline frantic.  I was anxious, I was trying so hard to get the business done quick so this poor mom could be on her way and help her baby.  I swore I wouldn't let my baby cry like that, the poor thing all it needed was to be held. HA!  Was I in for a rude awakening.  Here's a news flash sometimes babies cry!  Sometimes you can comfort them but sometimes you are in a car going down the interstate at 80 miles and hour and there is nothing you can do but just let them cry.  Sometimes even when you can pick them up an shush and sway and swaddle they still  cry. I learned very quickly that as long as he wasn't in imminent danger it is okay for him to cry a bit. It's what they do.


Well I have long been procrastinating cleaning toilets and dusting.  We have family coming to town this weekend and we couldn't be more excited for the big celebration.  Next week I'll share with you pictures of the party, in the meantime here are a few pictures from the past few weeks! Happy Tuesday!

Enjoying a meal at HuHot Mongolian Grill

Poor sick little bubby

This and That

It has taken us a while to truly believe that Oliver is saying his first word.  Maybe I shouldn't say believe but actually realize.  I'm not sure what I was expecting but I was thinking more along the lines of a well pronounced "dog" or "ball" or "Lola stop eating the baby's food".  Instead it was "that".  He's been saying it for about a month but we just took it for his usual babbling. Corey and I are constantly asking him, "what's that?" and then answering so I guess it makes sense.  Oh, but a wicked little game it has created.  Everything now is "that?" and then sometimes he'll look at us for the answer, sometimes he'll just point at something else and say "that" and then something else and so on and so forth.  I know that his little developing baby brain probably doesn't realize that he is asking "what's that?", "that" probably means "ball" or "dog" or "mom I'd like a snack" but as a human adult we are engineered that when asked a question we answer.  So when he points and says "that" 8 million times a day I am so inclined to answer. Quite exhausting really.  I thought we wouldn't hit this stage until he was about 2 and half or 3 but that is parenting...having an expectation and being completely blindsided by a very different answer or result.

In less that three weeks Oliver will turn one and it seems like just yesterday I was walking up and down the blocks of our neighborhood trying to bring on labor.  It was all in vain, an eviction notice had to be delivered and I was induced and after 14 hours of labor came this life changing little person and here we are 12 months later.  He is now using walking as his mode of transportation about 80% of the time. Crawling is saved for really crucial matters that require getting someplace at warp speed, like the stairs or Lola's dog bowls. He gives kisses on demand, big open mouthed kisses.  The really special ones are the kisses he doesn't have to be asked to give, those I want to wrap up in a tiny brown package with twine and put them in a time capsule to be opened 17 years from now. He still just has two teeth, the top ones have been working their way in for weeks but to no avail.

With the big birthday coming up I've been planning his birthday party.  Nothing over the top, just some family and friends and of course cake.  I've also been working on some special crafties for the day.  I'll share those after his party.

We've gotten one more room finished at Casa de Rekers.  The laundry room has now been painted.  I want to put in some cupboards and a shelf eventually but here is the before and after.  The paint color is Tranquility, it's from Lowes, it's a Valspar color I think.

Laundry room before

Laundry room after

Well we have places to go and people to see.  Namely the Children's Museum in Indianapolis.  We're going on this little adventure with Greta and her mom Carrie.  Thank goodness for the distraction too because those aforementioned top teeth are giving us heck and that makes for one clingy baby.  This adventure could be a success or it could be a total snot dripping, leg clinging, screaming from the back seat failure.  Let's keep our fingers crosses for success!

Settling Back In

Did you think I fell off the face of the earth?  In some ways I did for a bit.  We went on a much needed vacation....without the baby.  Although in reality I knew that this was much needed and that he was going to be well cared for it still was nerve wracking and anxiety inducing.  We flew to Scotsdale, Arizona and enjoyed good food, the sun and the spa.  I missed the crap out of Ollie but I came back refreshed and I like to think I came back as a better mommy, one with more patience and a little more sleep under my belt.

Dropping  us off at the airport...I think he knows something is up...

Now that vacation is out of the way we're working on getting our house to feeling a bit more homey.  The house we bought only had one room painted a color, all of the rest of the rooms are an eggshellish white.  A rather mopey white at that.  It's wonderful to have the blank slate but the white walls are bringing me back to my apartment living days and that feeling must be eradicated soon!!  We know that we can't make ourselves crazy with home projects and expect to get more done in a weekend than is humanly possible so we've made ourselves a goal to paint one room a weekend.  It's been difficult since we have been coming and going but this weekend we did manage to get Oliver's room painted. Here is a before and after.

BEFORE...have you ever seen more disgusting walls?

BEFORE #2

AFTER

AFTER #2

I'm not a huge fan of the painted woodwork, I would rather it be white but painting trimwork is a HUGE job and one that I don't really have the time and/or patience to deal with right now so we are leaving it as is for now.  We also still need to hang more pictures and wall decals,  I'll update you with the completely finished project soon!

I need to mention that Oliver has gone down for his nap twice today without so much as a peep.  I have laid him down still awake with his binkies and he chats with his stuffies for a while and then nods off. Yes binkies is plural, he likes to suck on one and hold onto one while he falls asleep. Apparently he finds much comfort in knowing that he shall never be binkie-less during his slumber.  So I would love to stay and chat awhile but I need to go high five myself for being an awesome mom and getting my baby to nap so easily. (HA! Yea right, like I had a stinking thing to do with it, I'm sure he'll be back to fighting naps like the plague tomorrow.)